Monday, 11 August 2014

Hiwi the kiwi writing

"I think there are lot of fish here so let's stop"I say we stoped to fish, and all of a sudden it was silent we felt a big thump on the boat. "AHHHHHHHHHHH" I screamed "there's a shark get off my rod oh...    to bad it ate my fish NOOOOOOOOOOOO" I shout. It was clinging on my fishing "GET OFF MY ROD I say "lucky we have life jackets my sister said "it's chasing us daddy go faster" " ok son" we had a beacon for the plane to hover over us. "Yay we are saved" I say "I Thort we were going to die" said my mummy. Then the plane came and saved, us "whooooo"


WALT: write to inform

Success Criteria
  • Create a clear image in the readers mind
  • Have a clear message (big idea)
  • Powerful words (precise, clear)
  • Reread writing and check for impact

    I choose this piece to publish because... i used my brain to get thes iders

    I need to practise...getting my full stops in the right place
    I am pleased about... my writing because i did it well
    WALT: edit and publish our writing
    Success Criteria
    • Use a font and colour that can be easily read
    • Must make sense
    • Correct spelling
    • Correct punctuation
    • Change at least 3 words to add impact for the reader

My writers notebook writing.

"Go away Bobbi"I say Bobbi come and purrs her head off. I go put Bobbi on my mums bed. Then spike come and jumps on me, he is really heavy but he does it sometimes. Then sponge comes and she stays in my for like an hour, she also snogs me "go away sponge" I say. I smelt the slobber all over my face. I don't know why she snogs me. Then In morning I hear the ratel from my dogs collar        

WALT: write to inform

Success Criteria
  • Create a clear image in the readers mind
  • Have a clear message (big idea)
  • Powerful words (precise, clear)
  • Reread writing and check for impact
My thinking questions

I choose this piece to publish because... I like it.
I need to practise... Getting my Capitol letters and full stops in the right place.
I am pleased about... Getting the right things in my story


My Published Writing
WALT: edit and publish our writing

Success Criteria
  • Use a font and colour that can be easily read
  • Must make sense
  • Correct spelling
  • Correct punctuation
  • Change at least 3 words to add impact for the reader